Roxas: 30 Angsts
by Nikki Kiraga
Summary: Collection of oneshots for the LJ community 30 angsts. Warning: VERY ANGSTY. Death is a near CONSTANT theme! Please read the information at the beginning of each oneshot before you read! I am not responsible for what you see if you don't!
1. Whiskey Lullaby

**Title:** Whiskey Lullaby  
**Author:** Nikki Kiraga  
**Theme: **Articles; Newspapers  
**Fic Number:** 1/30  
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Genre:** Angst, Drama  
**Warnings:** Death  
**AU/Canon:** AU  
**Pairing:** Axel/Roxas  
**Characters: **Roxas, Namine  
**Words:** 455  
**Summary:** How long would he waste his time?  
**Note: **Kingdom Hearts belongs to Square Enix, and the song "Whiskey Lullaby" belongs to Brad Paisley and Alyson Krauss.

**---  
**

How could this be happening? It wasn't supposed to end like _this_. And I most certainly shouldn't have found out this way…

I just stared at the newspaper. I'd read the article over and over again. Front page, big news in this small little town. We had one gang here, though they rarely did anything more than sell drugs. However, another gang came in, hoping to take over the town. That's when the war started.

I couldn't have known. I couldn't have helped him. I was away on business, eagerly waiting for the day I'd get to see him again.

I never knew that day would be his funeral.

When I got home, nobody spoke to me. In a small town, there are no secrets. Everyone knew about my Axel and I, how we loved each other, despite his flaws—the biggest of which being that he was involved in the local gang. Nobody but me knew about that… that is, until the war.

Now his face was on the front page. The list of victims, those who died in this wretched gang war. I began making bets with myself. How long would I continue going on without him? I knew I didn't want to. I had nothing left holding me here. So how long would I waste my time?

---

"Roxas?" A small blond girl slowly walked into the house. It was unlocked, that was strange. "Roxas, are you home?" She continued walking, heading for his bedroom.

The girl, Namine, wanted to comfort her dear brother. She'd seen him drinking a lot more, and knew that he was trying to wash away the pain. Axel was like a brother to her, too, so perhaps she could help.

As she stepped into the bedroom, she froze. There he laid with a note in his pale fingers and Axel's picture clutched in his arm. "R… roxas?" This time she was worried. She hurried to his side, placing her fingers on his neck. Under her fingers, under the cold flesh, there was nothing.

Namine trembled. "Roxas… no, not you too…" She turned as she realized there was music playing. It was the song he and Axel loved to sing together, just because of how beautiful and sad the song was. It was their special recording.

"He put that bottle to his head and pulled the trigger

And finally drank away his memory

Life is short but this time it was bigger

Than the strength he had to get up off his knees

We found him with his face down in the pillow

With a note that said 'I'll love him 'till I die'

And when we buried him beneath the willow

The angels sang a whiskey lullaby…"


	2. Bang Bang

**Title:** Bang Bang  
**Author:** Nikki Kiraga  
**Theme: **One Last Dinner  
**Fic Number:** 2/30  
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Genre:** Angst, Drama  
**Warnings:** Death  
**AU/Canon:** AU  
**Pairing:** Axel/Roxas  
**Characters: **Roxas, Axel  
**Words:** 155  
**Summary:** He shot me down...  
**Note: **Kingdom Hearts belongs to Square Enix, and the song "Bang Bang (My Baby Shot Me Down)" belongs to Nancy Sinatra.

---

_Bang bang_

_He shot me down_

_Bang bang_

_I hit the ground_

_Bang bang_

_That awful sound_

_Bang bang_

_My baby shot me down…_

He sighed as he took the last bites of his dinner. His _last_ dinner. He knew they were coming for him. He had pissed off the wrong people, and now he was going to pay for it.

He laughed bitterly. It's amazing what you think when you're about to die. All he could think about was his Axel, and he wondered what would happen to him after he was gone.

He lifted his head as he heard them break down his door. His eyes widened in shock as he saw his beautiful Axel walk up, with two guns pointed right at him. Axel grinned, and all he could think was at least he would have that wonderful grin as his final memory.

"Goodbye, Roxas."

_Bang bang_

_My baby shot me down…_


	3. Loving You to Death

**Title:** Loving You to Death  
**Author:** Nikki Kiraga  
**Theme: **Blush  
**Fic Number:** 3/30  
**Rating:** R  
**Genre:** Angst, Drama, Tragedy  
**Warnings:** Death, heavy sexual themes, BDSM  
**AU/Canon:** AU  
**Pairing:** Axel/Roxas  
**Characters: **Roxas, Axel  
**Words:** 287  
**Summary:** It was just a mistake…  
**Note: **Kingdom Hearts belongs to Square Enix.

---

The red tint on his cheeks was delicious. Axel licked his lips, looking at his Roxas. Bound, gagged, helpless. Just the way he liked it.

The redhead grinned at the blond, malicious intent in his emerald eyes. He chuckled when the lanky boy whimpered pitifully.

Oh, this was going to be _good_.

Roxas was a masochist at heart, and Axel himself was most _definitely_ one sadistic bitch.

"Does this scare you?" Axel asked, as he slowly slid the tip of his knife along Roxas' chest.

He whimpered in response, nodding fearfully. Although, the fear that his love instilled was by far the _best_ feeling he had _ever_ known.

Axel kissed and sucked at his neck, trailing the knife along his chest in small patterns. It was hard to control himself anymore. Both were so turned on, it was hard to bear.

After many hours of torture and passion, and a comfortable night of sleep, Axel awoke.

He turned to smile and caress Roxas' cheek, but met his lover's closed eyes and pale face.

He wondered why the boy's porcelain skin was paler than usual. He looked down, and his eyes landed on his love's bloodied chest, and his own blood-stained hands.

In his love, in his fiery passion, he accidentally dug the knife deep within Roxas' chest.

"No," he whimpered. It wasn't supposed to end this way. He hated himself; he had just killed the only person he had ever cared for.

Slowly, he pulled the knife from his chest.

"I'm so sorry, Roxas," he whispered, his voice broken, his heart shattered.

The blond angel frowned. He knew it was an accident, and never, _ever_ blamed the distressed man.

"It's okay, Axel. We'll be together again soon."


End file.
